Meet the "02 Princess" aka "Princess Bavaria", "Little Miss Princess of Bavarian Fire", "BMWCCA #23432849584 Princess", or the ever popular "Cone Masher Lisa."

A newbie to the Bavaria clan, Lisa has jumped headlong into the gaping Bavaria pit of doom; she already has gone down the 2002 path. Lisa is the proud owner of a shiny white 2002 she affectionately calls "Head Gasket" for reasons best not mentioned in mixed company.

A regular on the Senior Six Mailing List, Lisa loves to attend get togethers where she can "get serious and show them pansy SSR klowns how to shift into DRIVE and put the pedal to the metal!" Lisa just purchased a lovely Bavaria that has become "part of the family" .... of course, she was spied the other day in Safeway near San Jose trying to buy two TV dinners for an "evening of tenderness with my 6 cylinder dreamboat." Later, she was seen sitting in her Bavaria trying to spoon feed a veal cutlet into the glovebox.... The police were called but things took a turn for the better


when Lisa admitted that she was just cleaning up "from the mess Mr. Bavaria made trying to down the steamed carrots." Lisa loves to drive fast but has lately been reduced to flipping a quarter to see which "Teutonic Power Pack" will get the nod. More often then not, the "Big Six" seems to be getting the call. Indeed, Lisa likes the power but not the "extra two doors" which according to Lisa, "makes it too easy for the local yahoos to think they can get lucky..."

Lisa was hoping to get a 3.0Si for the "fuel injection" because it "is sort of like the 2002tii I never had." She ended up with a Bavaria but is still having trouble "feeling small" around the Big Six, especially after living around that 2002 for so long. Lisa is getting used to the torque and power of her new found toy but misses the "tossable nature" of the little 2002. One thing she does admire is the "huge trunk" with that E3. It makes the 2002 look like a bread box!

Indeed, Lisa has reportedly tried to sleep off a night on the town in LA inside the trunk of her Bavaria! "You know, in many ways, it was more comfortable than my futon," mused Lisa, "although the head room was a bit problematic...several times I rammed my head into the trunk lid after hearing a horn blast! Like, I thought I was in a horizontal phone booth at one point but I sure did feel SAFE!" Lisa reportedly got the idea of using her trunk in this way from Pete, also of California. Lisa does not recommend the "shut lid" approach because "I had to use my cell phone to call my friend to get me out. Next time, I'm installing a safety release from inside; I don't want to re-live the days I used to hide in the refrigerators in our local junkyard! WOW! Those were the days, eh!?!?"

Lisa is a regular at the local Autocross meets and loves to mingle with the BMW elite and show off her two prized possessions. When asked to pick a favorite, Lisa balks and replies that each one "has its own value and I wouldn't want to hurt the other's feelings." When on the track, there is no room for idle chatter despite the fact that she routinely talks to the cars to encourage a great time. "The other day," chimed Lisa, "I gave Mr. Bavaria some Amoco 93 octane and somehow, my lil 02 found out and was hurt!. He rewarded me with three mashed cones and the worst time in my class at the Pep Boys Autocross. I learned my lesson to NEVER treat them unequal again!" Although this isn't proven, Lisa says that she is quite sure they discuss things while she is away. "I think 02 has an inferiority complex that rivals that dog in Old Yeller."
(ed- I have no idea what this means)

Lisa hopes to one day open a Counseling Center for Cars for other troubled autos. "I think that California is ready for such a concept, " purports Lisa. "We already have a center for plants and I can tell you that these places REALLY work! I even went to the local chapter the other day without my plant and actually came away with a new take on the world around me; I have started to see things as a plant might see them, and it has helped me come to grips with the long silences at my family dinner table. Having a center devoted to the automobile is just a logical extension.... I think it would float in Cali!!"